Seek what matters, not your purpose
The pandemic wrought havoc with our collective human compass; the inner tool we employ as social beings to orient around our shared world. We were pushed to question fundamental, almost absolute norms:
What is helpful, what is harmful.
What is for the Self, for others.
What is safe, what is risky.
It’s no surprise, then, that in that prolonged chaos (oh, it was LOOONG), so many of us re-evaluated our lives, reaching for a deeper connection to how we spend our time, especially our work time. With many landing on the concept of purpose. To lead a work life of purpose.
But what is purpose? For a hot second, when sequestered in our homes, isolated and feeling both vulnerable and connected, ‘purpose’ seemed to translate into civic consciousness, flexing our social justice muscles, standing up for those with less power.
While this is a good human practice (continue championing underdogs, by all means), I want to revisit this definition because it seemed to knock people off their respective, authentic tracks. If we think about purpose as a noun, it can feel a bit untouchable. Too exalted. However, if we approach it as a verb, so to speak, to live purposefully, we can breathe some life and stretch into it.
So, what does it mean to live purposefully?
You want to have impact.
To know that your actions have affected others.
Confirmation that you matter.
And that is deeply personal, not social (or civic). It’s about inner work first, not external work.
How do we arrive at what matters to us? We explore and reflect on our values.
I’ve worked with many high performing individuals who - in their fierce work ethic and relentless dedication (admirable), invariably, separate themselves from what they want to do. Unquestionably, they have achieved and often, genuinely enjoy many aspects of their professional lives, but in their intensity, they can lose sight of what truly gets them up in the morning.
Values are not what activities/actions we like to do; rather, they are why we like to do them.
So, what moves you?
What lifts you?
What drives you?
In identifying our core values, we get to really know ourselves. And when we seek, or design opportunities from this place of knowing, the resulting experiences resonate. Deeply.
We feel like we matter.
We are living purposefully.
To think about
For You: Understanding what motivates us helps us better choose what we show up for, and what we reject (Yes! Reject and make space for the good stuff). To dig into what you value, think about a time and action when you felt whole and fulfilled. Reflect on that: What thrilled you? What were you doing? What made it so?
For Your Team: Oh, it’s hard to help people find how they matter at work. And help them stay connected to that mattering. We can impose our company’s purpose, but really, that doesn’t always land. To feel like we are working purposefully, we need to feel how we impact people - this hbr article. If you are looking to see impact for yourself or for your team, you’ll find it in stories of people who have been supported by your work. Check out this podcast on helping hyper achievement focused kids feel like they matter. You might see helpful parallels between teenagers and employees - full respect to all.
And, if you are curious about delving more deeply into your values - as an individual or a team leader - get in touch.
